Thursday, September 27, 2007

give him back to me

all these years ive been an idiot!
the person that ive been havin deep buried feelings was so near my reach
and it was quite obvious wad feelings he has for me back den
now i regret being so afraid to be committed and to make known my feelings,
wen we were in such good terms and really close last time
but because now we changed a lot, he changed alot -started to be critical, more outgoin, more whacky, more outspoken, more flirtatios, more attractive?:) but i cant consider him just because i didnt want to spoil our friendship and what we had.

and apparently wen my friend got her fingers all over him, now that they're in the same college, i felt a tinge of jealousy. its funny and awkward now when both my friends are so-called 'seeing' each other. the frustrations n feelings of betrayal im having when i got to know how both got MIA and having been spending more time together enjoying life without me.

and dat biatch! she have been confiding in him not to me anymore! argh! and vice versa, claiming they are of the same frequency! oh puhleezz i knew him longer and better den she ever did! and was also very2 close to her. its sad to know and that feeling that im like being betrayed. its coincidental that she ended up in the same college with him and got to meet often! and he used to contact me to chill or mit up but now its with her instead! hes the same! takes 2 hands to clap!

Of course i forgave her and him for friend's sake. but i had to trash things out with her first. and i did give a piece of my mind. about how disturbed i was of this whole thing. it was all a misunderstanding. she thought i was jealous of her because she gets into the college. why would i when im taking my degree in business now right? niwaes, so thats when i realised that she didnt understand the attitude i was giving her and decided to come clean and be straightforward. I wouldn't want all the almost 10 years of knowing each other to just go down the drain right? so its kinda partly solved for now. i wonder whether it will be worth it to fight for the one i had feelings for. hopefully things would turn out better. the matter of the heart is always complicated ain't it?

She says, "should i tell him i hav a crush on him?" - errr no grrl ure supposed to be my closefren not the other woman!

Posted by ZayS at 2:24 PM