Saturday, September 29, 2007

FUN DAY OUT!

Me and my cousin had a Saturday girls day out! It was FUN even though it was just the 2 of us. We just felt like going retro and just spend the day out to somewhere apart from the normal, usual Town. Guess where to? IKEA! That's right! NOthing excites me more then shopping at IKEA because it enables me to expand my creativity! And it was more fun if you were to go there without your parents trust me. Whenever I went with mine I felt restricted of my imagination and creativity as they would tend to go with their own taste -which is so traditional. I need something Fresh, Modern & Wild for my room in preparation of the upcoming Raya Festival! Well now, I just need the time the revamp it!

Posted by ZayS at 10:30 PM

Thursday, September 27, 2007

give him back to me

all these years ive been an idiot!
the person that ive been havin deep buried feelings was so near my reach
and it was quite obvious wad feelings he has for me back den
now i regret being so afraid to be committed and to make known my feelings,
wen we were in such good terms and really close last time
but because now we changed a lot, he changed alot -started to be critical, more outgoin, more whacky, more outspoken, more flirtatios, more attractive?:) but i cant consider him just because i didnt want to spoil our friendship and what we had.

and apparently wen my friend got her fingers all over him, now that they're in the same college, i felt a tinge of jealousy. its funny and awkward now when both my friends are so-called 'seeing' each other. the frustrations n feelings of betrayal im having when i got to know how both got MIA and having been spending more time together enjoying life without me.

and dat biatch! she have been confiding in him not to me anymore! argh! and vice versa, claiming they are of the same frequency! oh puhleezz i knew him longer and better den she ever did! and was also very2 close to her. its sad to know and that feeling that im like being betrayed. its coincidental that she ended up in the same college with him and got to meet often! and he used to contact me to chill or mit up but now its with her instead! hes the same! takes 2 hands to clap!

Of course i forgave her and him for friend's sake. but i had to trash things out with her first. and i did give a piece of my mind. about how disturbed i was of this whole thing. it was all a misunderstanding. she thought i was jealous of her because she gets into the college. why would i when im taking my degree in business now right? niwaes, so thats when i realised that she didnt understand the attitude i was giving her and decided to come clean and be straightforward. I wouldn't want all the almost 10 years of knowing each other to just go down the drain right? so its kinda partly solved for now. i wonder whether it will be worth it to fight for the one i had feelings for. hopefully things would turn out better. the matter of the heart is always complicated ain't it?

She says, "should i tell him i hav a crush on him?" - errr no grrl ure supposed to be my closefren not the other woman!

Posted by ZayS at 2:24 PM

Sunday, September 23, 2007

perfectionism

Perfectionism is the definition of a person who wants everything to go by order- in PERFECT order. A person who is displeased by anything that does not meet her standards & who is only satisfied if what she is doing is perfect(in her own definitions). In the context of art- a perfect replica of something with skills and passion. Organization plays a very important role in the life of a perfectionist. Being organized allows the perfectionist to execute her job smoothly without the distractions of the mess around her. That's why cleanliness is a MUST in every single motion/place. Her mind would be extremely disturbed by the mess and even the images of mold infested places like a damp toilet for instance, would haunt her like a nightmare. Therefore leaving her mind to be unfocused and unable to perform her other important duties like work or study. It's quite difficult and even annoying to be around a perfectionist if you don't understand her traits/ways. Everything doesn't necessarily work well for her because trying to achieve perfection is almost unrealistic and when not achieve will drive her to frustrations and insanity. How I wish I'm not a perfectionist.

Posted by ZayS at 3:06 PM

Sunday, September 09, 2007

I'm choking
I cant breathe
I'm gasping for air
I'm choking in tears
I felt as if my soul is forced out
My heart feels like it's tearing apart
The stomach is churning like it's going to empty its contents

My skull feel like breaking open
Revealing my melting brains
I can't think sanely anymore
This point in time, I just feel like vanishing

Where's my life?!
Why doesn't it goes smoothly?
But these questions are often questioned & left unanswered
And don't I know that too well already?!

I need my life to be back on track!
I need a MIRACLE to happen!
I need somebody to comfort me at my darkest/lowest level
I need someone to hold me and tell me "I understand you"- with sincerity.

Posted by ZayS at 10:44 PM

Thursday, September 06, 2007

when venus meets mars...

A supposedly fun evening turned out disastrous...
as the boy meets the girl
to watch the amazing chef rat
from the wonderful creation
of pixar animation.

The girl looked forward to that show
as the boy 'booked' the girl early for the date
but thanks to the bad planning of the boy
and to the girl's stupid shoes which came loose
time was wasted and the tickets were sold out.

So there goes the demolished hope of the girl which left her pissed.

And there goes the story-cum-tragedy when the boy meets girl.

The End.